This morning I witnessed a terrible terrible tragedy, whilst on the toilet I was watching the myriad of little black and brown house ants that we have infesting the house going about their business on the floor, then my eye was caught by a line of ants crawling up and over the brand new packet of toilet paper on the floor.When in perhaps a moment of madness, one ant wandered too close to the edge, was he feeling suicidal, or just curious, I don't think it was murder, there wasn't any other ant close to him.
As I watched the little ant wobbled on the edge and then, sadly and tragically and did a slow motion dive off the edge of the packet and landed on the floor, all crumpled up. Given our relative sizes, it would the equivalent of a human falling 7kms straight down, we'd be dead, however the little ant sort of uncrumpled himself, and then started to try and walk; alas and alack I have the feeling that the ant severely damaged himself, because the most he could manage was a sad slow sort of wobbling in a circle.
It was at this point I left the toilet, the ant was still struggling on the floor, I contemplated putting the poor thing out of its misery, but you know, let nature (ie the other ants) take its course, however when I went back in a couple of hours later, the ants were gone, but the little ant was still on the floor and still feebly struggling, so I leant down, very carefully picked the ant up on sheet of toilet paper, told the little ant I was sorry I'd left it in unecessary pain and suffering.
Then I squashed it and dumped it in the loo and flushed.
Did I tell you I hate ants?