a knotty problem...

[boodie]

I am sure that this post will probably be very controversial, but it's something that struck me quite forcibly this morning after watching Sunrise, and hearing the news that both Madonna and Brangelina were possibly adopting more children.

I know there are many thousands of children all over the world that need good, kind, loving parents, and a chance at a better life, however I also know that there are many thousands of people who want nothing more than to be able to give a child like that a chance.

I also know that it appears that there is an imbalance between number of children available and number of people who want to adopt, so theoretically this would mean, one hopes, that the child always ends up with the very best person available for them.

Because of this imbalance, that demand outweighs supply, I find it hard to believe that people who can NATURALLY have children, are allowed to adopt. My heart goes out to the couples/people who cannot have children and are on waiting lists for years and years, only to see people who CAN conceive and carry a child to term, adopting.

With more people wanting to adopt than children up for adoption, it's impossible to understand why people who cannot have children naturally do not have priority over couples with already naturally conceived children, surely those couples who have their own children understand how important this is for the childless couples, why would they be so selfish as to deny someone else that chance.

Now don't get me wrong, I adore Angelina Jolie and I think she is amazing, however I do wonder that if every time she adopted a small child, that there wasn't some childless couple sitting down in Anytown, sad because they've just been told there is no child for them. Because they weren't rich enough or famous enough to smooth out the legal bumps.

Of course the child should go to the best available person, but I find it very unbelievable that amongst all the childless couples wanting to adopt that they can't find a perfect match for every child.

Couples/people with naturally conceived children of their own, and couples capable of having and carrying a child to full term should be only be selected when there is absolutely no suitable childless couple waiting for a child. Regardless of their wealth or status.

Comments

[kuangning]

Actually, the only demographic where there are more people waiting to adopt than there are children to be adopted is babies and infants. Once the child's older than about three, there aren't many people willing to adopt them at all; people want babies, or at least children young enough to not remember any other parents. This is why Connor and Ari's foster mother wants so badly to adopt them, but Logan's still in a group home; he was too old. Connor was a year old; Ari was three. Logan was already five.

[funnelwebkitten.livejournal.com]

Sadly that is true, but you can't force people to adopt older children, everyone wants the babies/young ones.

I can sort of see the point, but if you really want a child, REALLY want a child, then a little bit of compromise won't kill you.

[funnelwebkitten.livejournal.com]

No, thats the point, there isn't an overflow of orphans or children put up for adoption, especially in Australia, and an overseas adoption is even more tricky to arrange and expensive.

And since there isn't that many up for adoption, then it hardly seems fair that sterile couples have to compete with couples who can concieve naturally.

[kuangning]

Mmhmm. That said, if these people are willing to adopt children older than three, and there's no reason to think they're bad parents, it shouldn't matter whether they can have kids of their own or not -- I can see putting that restriction on would-be adoptive parents of babies and infants, but not older children. There aren't enough adoptive parents to go around for anything but the little ones.

[funnelwebkitten.livejournal.com]

Oh I agree, I definitely agree, for harder to place children all those eligible should be allowed, including people able to concieve naturally, but for high demand, like babies and kiddies under three, then definitely only allow couples/people who cannot have their own children.